IM REDISCOVERING MY LIFE AS A GAY PARADE because of the love, the poetry i can spot in images again, the words that wouldnt come too hard or too jarring, because of sweet inebriation, because of rainy glasses and i dont miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind anymoreeeeeee. JOIN ME IN BEING GAY BUT BYOB.
MY BLOGMATE HAS A DOG WOOF.
Showing posts with label talkings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label talkings. Show all posts
today
i finally touched my right foot after ages, yes the one that's got approximately 8375967 coats of grime over it because it was too painful to even make it come in contact with flowing water.and also had another person touch it. dont ask me, he's a madman. with fingers like waterfalls, jesus christ.
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shayo: look, what happens in pune, stays in pune. because pune, its like goa man.
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and oh my god i cannot even believe it man.
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ankit's adaptation of anusha's "technically" talking face.
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burger king with all the cheese on the plate and the chikkin going down making me sick.
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going back to the same old game. hope your address is the same.
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not in that order.
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shayo: look, what happens in pune, stays in pune. because pune, its like goa man.
-
and oh my god i cannot even believe it man.
-
ankit's adaptation of anusha's "technically" talking face.
-
burger king with all the cheese on the plate and the chikkin going down making me sick.
-
going back to the same old game. hope your address is the same.
-
not in that order.
I'm tired.
I'm tired of sitting still and worrying because at this moment, like RIGHT now? i don't have a hope for a future and everything i've ever taken for granted, some things i just decided would happen, they all seem nonexistent, and impossibilities in a world that's beginning to spiral more and more out of my control, and which is starting to seem exactly like books that are written to describe sorrow and longing, that always ALWAYS end with some sort of pitiable form of supposed satisfaction because really, it's EASY to erase a life of pain and staring through warm windows in rags, with something as sublime as a smile, or peace in death.
right?
i cannot do this. i cannot listen to someone complain about getting a really good college IN bangalore, with a course that they want, because of some ill-conceived idea that they have to move to hostel. SHE LIVES HERE WHY WOULD SHE GO TO HOSTEL. and THAT is why her life is ruined?
it really is the least of my problems. i cant be nice. i dont want to try. i want to stay home. and i want to be back in school back to knowing what would happen the next day the next year atleast WHERE i would go the next day the next year.
and you know what the worst part is?
i wish i didn't know anyone i did.
i'm not who they think i am i will not live up to expectations i'm on a one-way trip no backtracks no U-turns no side lanes no nothing on a path to absolutely nowhere. so here's to me.
I'm tired of sitting still and worrying because at this moment, like RIGHT now? i don't have a hope for a future and everything i've ever taken for granted, some things i just decided would happen, they all seem nonexistent, and impossibilities in a world that's beginning to spiral more and more out of my control, and which is starting to seem exactly like books that are written to describe sorrow and longing, that always ALWAYS end with some sort of pitiable form of supposed satisfaction because really, it's EASY to erase a life of pain and staring through warm windows in rags, with something as sublime as a smile, or peace in death.
right?
i cannot do this. i cannot listen to someone complain about getting a really good college IN bangalore, with a course that they want, because of some ill-conceived idea that they have to move to hostel. SHE LIVES HERE WHY WOULD SHE GO TO HOSTEL. and THAT is why her life is ruined?
it really is the least of my problems. i cant be nice. i dont want to try. i want to stay home. and i want to be back in school back to knowing what would happen the next day the next year atleast WHERE i would go the next day the next year.
and you know what the worst part is?
i wish i didn't know anyone i did.
i'm not who they think i am i will not live up to expectations i'm on a one-way trip no backtracks no U-turns no side lanes no nothing on a path to absolutely nowhere. so here's to me.
ze curses.
you KNOW what.
THE THING with me being in a cold war. IS THAT I CANNOT GO THROUGH WITH THE STUPID THING. WHY, you ask? Shouldn't it be the easiest thing to ignore someone?
well NO.
if it WAS easy to ignore someone i wouldn't ever talk to them ANYWAY which JUSTSORTA JUST rules out the option of a cold war ANYWAY.
which means i should get with doing the apologising, yes? NO. i apologise way too much, i shall not this time. which leaves me in World's Most Desirable Position Numero One : The person who's obssessing about a cold war gone cold and mostlyonlyplotting to strangle other person in aforementioned cold war but will NOT due to the fact that all the attention showered on opposing party will force their head to a size declared unsafe by an UN peace treaty WHICH will in turn lead my strangulation tendencies to increase 17 fold.
The BEST part being, now all the frustration has nothing to do with the actual reason why the whole thing started (which continues to be a mystery, i assure you), and everything to do with the fact that i'm bored and have noone to talk to, and it's not WORTH not being on non-speaking terms with someone - that's just a waste of someone with whom on a perfectly normal day i COULD be speaking to.
Is this even making sense anymore?
THE THING with me being in a cold war. IS THAT I CANNOT GO THROUGH WITH THE STUPID THING. WHY, you ask? Shouldn't it be the easiest thing to ignore someone?
well NO.
if it WAS easy to ignore someone i wouldn't ever talk to them ANYWAY which JUSTSORTA JUST rules out the option of a cold war ANYWAY.
which means i should get with doing the apologising, yes? NO. i apologise way too much, i shall not this time. which leaves me in World's Most Desirable Position Numero One : The person who's obssessing about a cold war gone cold and mostlyonlyplotting to strangle other person in aforementioned cold war but will NOT due to the fact that all the attention showered on opposing party will force their head to a size declared unsafe by an UN peace treaty WHICH will in turn lead my strangulation tendencies to increase 17 fold.
The BEST part being, now all the frustration has nothing to do with the actual reason why the whole thing started (which continues to be a mystery, i assure you), and everything to do with the fact that i'm bored and have noone to talk to, and it's not WORTH not being on non-speaking terms with someone - that's just a waste of someone with whom on a perfectly normal day i COULD be speaking to.
Is this even making sense anymore?
I have no idea why i'm still awake but i shall post anyway because it's been long and i'm feeling vaguely chatty :P
SHRIPARNA WAS TO COME TO BANGALORE TODAY! but curse her and her dutifullythydaughter nature she WILLISNOT coming. no.
much less interesting than that(look personally, i'd recommend you skipping this post it shall contain nothing noteworthy, hardly anything worth reading, and be absolutely devoid of any or all information ok?), is the fact that i worked in poor light(*applauds bangalore power cut*) over a farewell we'll miss you you take care now card that we decided to (have me) make for a classmate who we hear today, is leaving to kerala tomorrow.
which brings me to my life and it's aimlessnessocity.
shriparna is going to off to mumbai to study.
another to orissa.
another to dehradun.
another for pilot training.
another to kerala.
another to pune.
and the rest i'm sure somewhere else to fulfill the dreams of their focussed lives.
whiile i sit blithering about my aimlessness making lists in my head about the letters i should send and movies to watch.
i really must come up with more readable things to post :-\
SHRIPARNA WAS TO COME TO BANGALORE TODAY! but curse her and her dutifullythydaughter nature she WILLISNOT coming. no.
much less interesting than that(look personally, i'd recommend you skipping this post it shall contain nothing noteworthy, hardly anything worth reading, and be absolutely devoid of any or all information ok?), is the fact that i worked in poor light(*applauds bangalore power cut*) over a farewell we'll miss you you take care now card that we decided to (have me) make for a classmate who we hear today, is leaving to kerala tomorrow.
which brings me to my life and it's aimlessnessocity.
shriparna is going to off to mumbai to study.
another to orissa.
another to dehradun.
another for pilot training.
another to kerala.
another to pune.
and the rest i'm sure somewhere else to fulfill the dreams of their focussed lives.
whiile i sit blithering about my aimlessness making lists in my head about the letters i should send and movies to watch.
i really must come up with more readable things to post :-\
what.
today, for some holy reason, dad showed SOME interest in what i said and DID bloody respond relevantly, even though it was one solitary sentence he spilled.
me: I LOST PHOTOSHOP AAAAAAAAA WTF KJSHDKFHDSJHF {ohyes i did by theway :stabs 3476 pillows: }
Dad: (after 10 minutes) cant you, like, download photoshop?
me: :O er, it'll take ages ...
(dad's gone by the time i finish saying 'take')
xD
me: I LOST PHOTOSHOP AAAAAAAAA WTF KJSHDKFHDSJHF {ohyes i did by theway :stabs 3476 pillows: }
Dad: (after 10 minutes) cant you, like, download photoshop?
me: :O er, it'll take ages ...
(dad's gone by the time i finish saying 'take')
xD
Babsy.
Babrus Khan: now i see anything that is smaller than your nostril is a pebble
and that wich is not
is a brick.
such conclusions people draw. he's a good drawer too, bah.
and that wich is not
is a brick.
such conclusions people draw. he's a good drawer too, bah.
HAAHA AND TO THINK WE'VE BEEN IN DIFFERENT CITIES FOR THEPAST1.5YEARS
x: do you write letters?
necromancer.aglitter: yeah
but not often
why?
x: to whom?
necromancer.aglitter: i used to write to chennai friends
but well
we drifted
so
x: SAME PINCH
I DONT LIKE HOW PEOPLE DONT REPLY
necromancer.aglitter: yeah i know i love getting letters!!!
x: i love writing letters and recieving
WHAT
:D
necromancer.aglitter: ME THREEMETHREE!!
x: AND you live in a different city
necromancer.aglitter: < this is going somewhere i believe >
< i could be wrong of course :P>
x: AND they wont call us abnormal if we write to each other
necromancer.aglitter: I KNOW!!
x: so
HAHAHAA
necromancer.aglitter: especially since BOTH of us know who "they" are! :D
x: I GOT TWO ENVELOPES FROM SCHOOL TODAY
WHITE AND CLEAN
necromancer.aglitter: i live in a city with post offices!
:D
OH MY GOD
we're like destined to write to each other! :D
necromancer.aglitter: yeah
but not often
why?
x: to whom?
necromancer.aglitter: i used to write to chennai friends
but well
we drifted
so
x: SAME PINCH
I DONT LIKE HOW PEOPLE DONT REPLY
necromancer.aglitter: yeah i know i love getting letters!!!
x: i love writing letters and recieving
WHAT
:D
necromancer.aglitter: ME THREEMETHREE!!
x: AND you live in a different city
necromancer.aglitter: < this is going somewhere i believe >
< i could be wrong of course :P>
x: AND they wont call us abnormal if we write to each other
necromancer.aglitter: I KNOW!!
x: so
HAHAHAA
necromancer.aglitter: especially since BOTH of us know who "they" are! :D
x: I GOT TWO ENVELOPES FROM SCHOOL TODAY
WHITE AND CLEAN
necromancer.aglitter: i live in a city with post offices!
:D
OH MY GOD
we're like destined to write to each other! :D
new look, mahn! <3
i dig it so much that im tempted to un-private this blog just to show off xD
AND i guess ill do so soon mwahahahaha
updates: maths went horribly, more so because i did KNOW the stuff, i just went blank trying to pen them. yes that DOESNT HAPPEN with maths i know. its just the bad-workman syndrome. or as Baron would put it- the Self-Serving Bias in Attribution. the fuck, i have a psychology exam tomorrow and i have the entire board sylabus spread out before me, begging to be touched. wow does that sound inviting :/ and falling sick AT LEAST once a week does NOT help even remotely. do hell with the allergies, i cant even deal with the drowsiness! damnthethyroid. eco day after. and after the KB episode- oh well let me tell you about it. i just randomly, in some random eco class, call the eco teacher (who happens to be one of the veryfew good teachers left in the school) crazy on her face.
"ma'am, are you crazy?"
"..what did you say Shriparna?"
(instead of taking the hint and shutting the fuck up, if not apologising fervently)"MA'AM YOU'RE CRAZY!"
...
do not ask me.just dont. i have an appointment with the councellor right after the exams, thank you, dont remind me. i dont need shrinks, i just need people to drive up the wall and these would make good victims anyway.smart ones. hmm. that brings me back to psychology, abnomality, mental disorders and shit like that which happens to be A PART OF THE SYLABUS FOR TOMORROW'S EXAM okbye.
i dig it so much that im tempted to un-private this blog just to show off xD
AND i guess ill do so soon mwahahahaha
updates: maths went horribly, more so because i did KNOW the stuff, i just went blank trying to pen them. yes that DOESNT HAPPEN with maths i know. its just the bad-workman syndrome. or as Baron would put it- the Self-Serving Bias in Attribution. the fuck, i have a psychology exam tomorrow and i have the entire board sylabus spread out before me, begging to be touched. wow does that sound inviting :/ and falling sick AT LEAST once a week does NOT help even remotely. do hell with the allergies, i cant even deal with the drowsiness! damnthethyroid. eco day after. and after the KB episode- oh well let me tell you about it. i just randomly, in some random eco class, call the eco teacher (who happens to be one of the veryfew good teachers left in the school) crazy on her face.
"ma'am, are you crazy?"
"..what did you say Shriparna?"
(instead of taking the hint and shutting the fuck up, if not apologising fervently)"MA'AM YOU'RE CRAZY!"
...
do not ask me.just dont. i have an appointment with the councellor right after the exams, thank you, dont remind me. i dont need shrinks, i just need people to drive up the wall and these would make good victims anyway.smart ones. hmm. that brings me back to psychology, abnomality, mental disorders and shit like that which happens to be A PART OF THE SYLABUS FOR TOMORROW'S EXAM okbye.
^^
B: :sneaks from behind and squeezes:
x: :stabs your eye thinking its some weirdass stalker:
wait but you ARE a stalker
>___>
B: x_O YAY!!! I GOT TO GET STABBED BY SHIP!! YOU UNLUNKY STAKAHZ -shows to other stalkers-
x: ...
B: -suddenly a stampede of people runs after the ship to get stabbed by her-
x: :kills herself laughing:
:making you the LAST of a kind: (to have been stabbed by themightyship)
B: :is crucified in jealousy and conspiracy of her jew stalkers:
x: wow, how many imaginary people are at play here? XD
so after your death
soul meets soul and all that jazz
xD
sooperhit movie material.
B: lmao!
XD
-later stalkers realize that they will get to meet in heaven or hell so they all suicide and cudnt find them in either in hell or heaven... because they are in purgatory sitting next to eachother and talking on gtalk-
x: :stabs your eye thinking its some weirdass stalker:
wait but you ARE a stalker
>___>
B: x_O YAY!!! I GOT TO GET STABBED BY SHIP!! YOU UNLUNKY STAKAHZ -shows to other stalkers-
x: ...
B: -suddenly a stampede of people runs after the ship to get stabbed by her-
x: :kills herself laughing:
:making you the LAST of a kind: (to have been stabbed by themightyship)
B: :is crucified in jealousy and conspiracy of her jew stalkers:
x: wow, how many imaginary people are at play here? XD
so after your death
soul meets soul and all that jazz
xD
sooperhit movie material.
B: lmao!
XD
-later stalkers realize that they will get to meet in heaven or hell so they all suicide and cudnt find them in either in hell or heaven... because they are in purgatory sitting next to eachother and talking on gtalk-
ok so today in school.. with shreya ma'am.in the computerlab.
Ishi: im suffering from this block for a verrrry long time
me: BLOCKS.dont even TALK about blocks to me.
Shreya ma'am: yes. blocks? she's bluilt of blocks.
...
also, if youre a fucking baka(japanese for idiot), your must shiine(go die).
like for example- SC. a girl in my class.so totally must.i will kill her one of these days else.
oyasumi nasai, anyway.
(gnight)
Ishi: im suffering from this block for a verrrry long time
me: BLOCKS.dont even TALK about blocks to me.
Shreya ma'am: yes. blocks? she's bluilt of blocks.
...
also, if youre a fucking baka(japanese for idiot), your must shiine(go die).
like for example- SC. a girl in my class.so totally must.i will kill her one of these days else.
oyasumi nasai, anyway.
(gnight)
lets put this down here.
pujita: {randomly in class (where we do anything but pay heed to the rest of it) while discussing some orkut-initiated lovestories} ..see scrap count is not the index of...
ship: {raised eyebrows} yes?
pujita: look, i have 11 friends on my list and still have a steady boyfriend, and you have over 200 friends on your list and what not, but you've always always been single. {smug smile}
...
pujita: yes ok i know this is stupid {gets back to definite integrals}
pujita: {randomly in class (where we do anything but pay heed to the rest of it) while discussing some orkut-initiated lovestories} ..see scrap count is not the index of...
ship: {raised eyebrows} yes?
pujita: look, i have 11 friends on my list and still have a steady boyfriend, and you have over 200 friends on your list and what not, but you've always always been single. {smug smile}
...
pujita: yes ok i know this is stupid {gets back to definite integrals}
