YOU.

shriparna. are you getting my messages?

i shouldnt. its not gonna happen. give up.

So i'm bored. :D

college begins first of august and apparently i've now taken a dislike to numbers so i'm no longer using them no. :P i'm doing dental yes but for some reason my father is still under the delusion i will get medicine in some far away corner of karnataka so i'm just going to stick with saying i've taken dental for the time being after which i will have finally actually really have officially taken dental.

there.

and. lot's of people are moving to bangalore yay. there's paroma and shreya and some more to chennai hurrah. world getting smaller indeed :)

but randomly, you know the part that makes me jump around like a sugarhigh kangaroo everytime? I will NEVER EVEREVER have to learn the proofs for gravity or rotational motion or lens laws or thermodynamics or equilibrium EVER. =D

but i try not to think of that too much, i'm a little wary of the divine backlash. :-\

though now that i have *jumps around like a sugarhigh kangaroo* =P

when love is a puddle you are reduced to

all that happens is rain.

NO ONE LAST TIMES

but this one last post is an exception. I wish there were more exceptions, but heh. high high very high hopes.

I'm tired.

I'm tired of sitting still and worrying because at this moment, like RIGHT now? i don't have a hope for a future and everything i've ever taken for granted, some things i just decided would happen, they all seem nonexistent, and impossibilities in a world that's beginning to spiral more and more out of my control, and which is starting to seem exactly like books that are written to describe sorrow and longing, that always ALWAYS end with some sort of pitiable form of supposed satisfaction because really, it's EASY to erase a life of pain and staring through warm windows in rags, with something as sublime as a smile, or peace in death.
right?

i cannot do this. i cannot listen to someone complain about getting a really good college IN bangalore, with a course that they want, because of some ill-conceived idea that they have to move to hostel. SHE LIVES HERE WHY WOULD SHE GO TO HOSTEL. and THAT is why her life is ruined?

it really is the least of my problems. i cant be nice. i dont want to try. i want to stay home. and i want to be back in school back to knowing what would happen the next day the next year atleast WHERE i would go the next day the next year.

and you know what the worst part is?
i wish i didn't know anyone i did.

i'm not who they think i am i will not live up to expectations i'm on a one-way trip no backtracks no U-turns no side lanes no nothing on a path to absolutely nowhere. so here's to me.

when i see old people it makes me sad. they should die.