I'm trying to, i really am, i'm trying to poison myself against you.
butitworks only as long as you'renotaround.

i wish you would read this. i wish you would read this, and come tell me how low i've placed myself. then i'd figure out how high you stand.
i wish you could read my head. my twisted emotions knotting around me, that'd make you feel important, yes.
Then you could laugh at me, think oh look how pathetic, how sorry, like you would do. or maybe just walk away, oblivious to all you've seen, all you heard, forgetting asfastasyousmileatthenextgirl, that i ever existed.

maybe that would jolt me back to the world, make it so i don't have to explain, have to make them understand.

i don't like you.
you're just a habit.

idon'tlikeyou.
i tend to obsess.

i dont like you.
i just hurt easy.

i. don't. like. you.
but maybe i'm just telling myself that.